Well, it's been nearly two weeks since I posted. I'm happy to say that I've been doing very well. Especially given all that I've been around. Halloween is coming up and everybody has been having parties and dressing up all weekend. For some reason a lot of women seem to think that nothing is a costume! Everywhere I look has been women wearing as little as they can legally get a way with. It's been hard to say the least, and I give thanks to God for the strength that I've received!

I came to a realization about a week ago that all that I ever really knew about God has left my heart and mind. Well, I came to the realization a long time ago, but have now decided to pay attention to it.
I grew up in a Christian home. I have two very devout and wise parents, and from an early age I was taught about Jesus. I remember loving and worshiping him, and developing a relationship with him. As I got into pornography, more and more I left him aside. With that, I left aside what I knew of his character. I left aside my knowledge of how to pray and how to read the Bible. Now I'm in my twenties and I'm discovering that I don't know how to pray. I often forget that the Bible even exists! Sure, I can spew off knowledge and wisdom the Bible tells us, but I don't really take it to heart. I don't, at all, follow what it preaches. I am one of the pharasies. Plain and simple. I can tell people what the Bible says to do, but I don't practice it myself.
God has become that friend that you reunite with after 15 years of little to no contact. You remember him. You like him. You can recount old memories with only minimal clarity, but after a few minutes of talking you realize that this person is much different. Things have changed. Whole worlds of experience have gone past, and this person in front of you is a stranger that bears a small resemblance of someone you knew long ago.
Now that I know what I am, and where I stand with God, I've decided to take the bull by the horns and throw myself at God. My wife and I had a talk recently about how our lives are doing. We discovered that our relationships with God are quite shabby! Unlike me, my wife grew up with an atheist father and a mother that was bitter with God. Sparing you her whole life story, she found Jesus at age 15. After that, she led a very passionate life with God, but I don't think ever really delved deep into the Bible. She read the Bible, but I don't think studied it to be able to grow deeper with him. Now her passion has started to die. Regardless of the differences of our stories, we have both become infants in the site of God. After this talk, we agreed that we need to start studying the Bible together. She and I went to the local Christian bookstore and found a weekly Bible study book from Willow Creek all about laying the foundation for spiritual growth and transformation. We have already gone through week one, and are committing ourselves to do this every week on Friday afternoon. This Bible study is very well written, and thought provoking enough to challenge, but not to overwhelm. If you are in the same place we are, I would recommend getting this book.

Also, today is the start of Pornography awareness week, so get or make your white ribbons!